As a mother you constantly find yourself in the position of waiting. Pregnancy- that's 9-10 months. Labor- minutes can seem like hours, and hours like days, and my first born was a lovely 71 hours. Emergency doctor visits- 2 hours at least, to be seen. Since our youngest is special needs: going to specialists?- Hmph, those visits can be 1-2 hours long. And labs!? Don't get me started! An easy 3-4 hour hospital visit. Then they get older and fall or some other event and you experience the emergency room…HA! Four hours for 5 stitches recently for our oldest son…and we got there at 11:00 pm, after he got off of work. SIGH..Yes…motherhood does mean many times of waiting. But those are just the chronological moments. What about the moments of waiting for the first word, crawling… Kindergarten? Those milestones that you don't always measure how long it took to achieve them. When it happened, you simply marked it down in a book somewhere. There was no true wait because it happened around the time you expected it to.
For those of us with special needs children however, those moments can be so far delayed, that the wait seems forever. Recently, I was filling out some forms at my son's school and while we were in the lobby my son Zechariah told another child and his mom: "that's my mom; her name Tracey". Shocked, I stopped doing the paper work and stared. Now the mother of the other child just looked at me like I was crazy, but a receptionist saw the moment and smiled. With my mouth gaped open I kept staring; until finally the mother asked me, "did he say something wrong?" I smiled and said "No, I just didn't know he knew my name." I'd never heard him say it before, let alone in a sentence. For a "normal" kindergartner mom this is not a big deal; but imagine waiting 6 years to hear that statement…and then think how much more value it would be to you. With all the therapies and scary moments in his life, that was a wonderful moment, it was miraculous, and it was worth the wait!
And that's where I find myself with our first conference. As we press forward, waiting for donations, pulling together speakers and artists. We have the highest degrees in hand, vision written, location and contracts ready and yet… We have to wait.
Waiting on God to move can be so hard and painful at times. From a spiritual standpoint it seems the enemy doesn't wait at all. No matter what denomination you are you can appreciate this question: Doesn't it seem like hell-fire will find you and jump in your path faster than God's plan or what we deem His rewards for us? It can be hard to see the delay as good, the humbling moments that are more than anyone could imagine. It can be hard to keep your head high and press towards a mark- to give birth to a long-term vision and dream. But then, I keep wondering…when it happens, will I appreciate it more because I had to wait? Will it be like that moment when Zechariah said my name? Will it be such a sweet, rewarding moment that words and grateful tears will never fully articulate my praise?
Yes! I know it will! So I praise God for being a Mom… because it prepared me to know how to wait for this moment. I'll see you all in Orlando, August 2015 for the Breathe Conference…
God willing.
-Tracey V. Council- Ph.D. Executive Director of Breathe 150 Entertainment "Allowing everyone that has breath to praise the Lord!"
No comments:
Post a Comment